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Table of Contents
Introduction: How to Get Your Food Spit In
Our server is AWFUL!
Waiting Tables is a LOT like being a hooker.
How I got sucked in, part 1
How I got sucked in, part 2
Training your soul away.
NEVER close the doors.
Don't let your children pee on the floor.
Five Ways to Avoid a Wait.
The Top Ten Ways to Avoid Getting Your Food Spit In
Top Ten Complaints Heard in Restaurants and the Reason They Aren't as Bad as You Think
Five reasons secret shoppers are evil.
Getting Ready for Christmas
The last two days I worked 27 hours at the restaurant. You may think that is a lot but for 2 weeks nearing Christmas 13 hour days are the norm. Where I wor...
Last Saturday night my wife and I sent our daughter to her grandmother’s and went to a nice restaurant for dinner. It was the kind of place where you can...
Server Not Servant
“Italian Foodie” Schools Chef of Italian Restaurant
This is just too good not to share. Example #7,662 why restaurant owners and staff loathe amateur restaurant ‘”reviewers.” A friend invited me and my wife...
The Slightly Cranky (Former) Waitress
I love making people feel like assholes.
That fact might make me, myself, an asshole. I'm okay with that. Like most restaurants, we have a problem with self-seaters. A surprising number of people ...
Bond with your chef. Learn the menu. Understand the clientelle. Know how to use the equipment. Taste. Be polite to the wait staff. Treat your kitchen s...
Fuck My Table
The Oatmeal Is Fucking Awesome
I have read The Oatmeal for quite a while now. Well over a year, maybe two. I have always enjoyed Inman’s crazy style and humor, but now… But now he has ju...